[dlgn]

I wish for a red Bugatti Veyron.

You get your car, but on your first test drive the brakes give out and you careen into oncoming traffic, left with shreds of metal in your chest as your life ebbs away.

I wish that my laptop would stop losing internet connection.

Granted. It can't lose a connection it doesn't have.

I wish my computer was fixed.

[Skylord_Fox]

I wish for a red Bugatti Veyron.

You get your car, but on your first test drive the brakes give out and you careen into oncoming traffic, left with shreds of metal in your chest as your life ebbs away.

I wish that my laptop would stop losing internet connection.

Granted. It can't lose a connection it doesn't have.

I wish my computer was fixed.

Granted.
I wish I had more free time.

[Eetrab]

I wish I had more free time.

Granted. From your perception, everything stands still. You grow old in a frozen in time world, eventually dying from insanity.

I wish for an intangible concept.

[Tee]

I wish for an intangible concept.

Your wish is granted, and in a moment of earth-shattering illumination you develop a complete understanding of a sublime intangible concept. Unfortunately your puny prefrontal cortex is unable to reconcile this paradox and collapses inwards, creating a momentary singularity that tears apart the space-time continuum.

I wish this thread didn't exist.

[Slathalin]

its doesn't. then, Beh42 creates it.

I wish for _______

[LeafWarrior254]

its doesn't. then, Beh42 creates it.

I wish for _______

Granted.

I wish for a baseball.

[Skylord_Fox]

I wish for a baseball.

Granted: you get a brand new baseball. It is also a sentient being that can only communicate to just you through telepathy. You are the only one who can hear it, and no matter where you are you can hear it. It always knows what you are thinking, or what you are about to do. You decide to hit it like a real baseball. Then it screams in agony and rage into your mind for weeks. You lose it and it forever calls to you with dispair until you find it again.
I wish for a scythe.

[dlgn]

I wish for a baseball.

Granted: you get a brand new baseball. It is also a sentient being that can only communicate to just you through telepathy. You are the only one who can hear it, and no matter where you are you can hear it. It always knows what you are thinking, or what you are about to do. You decide to hit it like a real baseball. Then it screams in agony and rage into your mind for weeks. You lose it and it forever calls to you with dispair until you find it again.
I wish for a scythe.

Why does everyone associate scythes with evil/death? Maybe they want to be good weapons, you never know!

Scythes are typically known as the weapon of the Grim Reaper himself. It was typically a tool known for harvesting wheat and other crops from fields and is used by Grim as a representation of his "Harvesting" souls.
They fit in the same place as sickles as they can be also used for war and fighting alongside the agricultural use with very few or no changes to the tool, and have been used in wars as such, and are often very sharp and dangerous weapons and tools.
So scythes typically represent death as they have lost they're use in farming and replaced by many types of machines, and while still used today in farming, they are in short supply.
Here's the only relatable pony picture I can find, of or by (I can't remember) Question Pinkamena. Heads up! The link is a cupcakes parody thing, treat it as such: Strong language and violence! Though the art is good and there's some good humor to be found.

Spoiler:

This is now your sig.

I wish for even more upvotes.

[Ratta237]

I wish for even more upvotes.

You get one trillion upvotes but that is too many upvotes.
You crash the website and you become the "unpopular guy that crashed the website".

I wish for numbers

[dlgn]

I wish for even more upvotes.

You get one trillion upvotes but that is too many upvotes.
You crash the website and you become the "unpopular guy that crashed the website".

I wish for numbers

You get Numbers, the book of the bible. The movie version. It is creepy and boring and everyone hates it.

I wish I didn't need to sleep more than 4 hours, but still could if I wanted to.